crime
Everyone In Michigan Arrested Just To Be Safe
ANN ARBOR, MI — In the wake of police arresting University of Michigan's football coach Sherrone Moore, authorities have decided to go ahead and just arrest everyone else in Michigan, just to be safe."Literally everyone is committing a…
Brown University Shooting Investigators Share More Photos, Widen Search: Report
According to a New York Post report, Providence police are widening the dragnet in the hunt for the at-large Brown University gunman who murdered two students and wounded seven others — and now they want the public’s help identifying a person…
Brown University Hires Chief Wiggum To Track Down Shooter
PROVIDENCE, RI — Leadership at Brown University, frustrated with the lack of progress in tracking the shooter who killed two students and injured many more on December 13, has reportedly recruited Chief Clancy Wiggum of Springfield to assist in…
Grassley: Obama DOJ Blocked Investigation Into Clinton Corruption
AP ImagesBill and Hillary Clinton The FBI and Justice Department of President Barack Obama didn’t just help 2016 Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton stage the Russia Collusion Hoax. Top officials in the two pro-Clinton…
Trump Aggravates MAGA Base With Nasty Post About Murder of Rob Reiner
AP ImagesRob Reiner Already in trouble with MAGA backers because of putative plans to invade Venezuela, President Donald Trump further alienated those supporters today, including top Republicans on Capitol Hill, with a cruel,…
Australian Man Who Wrestled Gun Away From Terrorist Charged With Unlawful Firearm Possession
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA — A heroic man who bravely wrestled away a rifle from an Islamic terrorist during the deadly shooting at Bondi Beach on Sunday has been formally charged with the unlawful possession of a firearm."Rest assured, this man is…
To Halt Violence Against Jews, Australia Bans Hanukkah
MELBOURNE — To stem the growing tide of violence against Jewish citizens, the Australian government has moved to officially ban the celebration of Hanukkah. Prime Minister Anthony Albanese made the announcement in the wake of Islamic attacks on…
FAKE NEWS: Media Reports Mass Shooting In Australia But That’s Impossible Because Guns Are Illegal There
WORLD — Fake news media across the globe have reported that a mass shooting occurred in Australia, which is literally impossible because guns are illegal there.Despite the patent absurdity of criminals using guns, which are banned, several major…
DOT: NY Unlawfully Issuing CDLs; More Foreigners Cause Fatal Crashes
New York Post/XScene of fatal accident in Tennessee The Federal Motor Carrier Safety Administration (FMCSA) announced today that an audit of New York state found that more than 50 percent of non-domiciled commercial driver’s licenses…
Trump Pardons “Election Denier” Tina Peters, but State Officials Aren’t Releasing Her
AP ImagesTina Peters After 10 months of attempts to convince Colorado’s judicial officials to release her, President Donald Trump stepped in and pardoned “election denier” Tina Peters himself. But she isn’t likely to be released…