WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump confirmed on Friday that, instead of attending his son’s wedding in the Bahamas, he had a very special surprise for him: Cuba.
Ahead of his wedding to Palm Beach socialite Bettina Anderson, Donald Trump Jr. reportedly received a golden envelope from his father containing a handwritten note from his father that said, “Cuba!”
“Wow, Dad, you really shouldn’t have,” Don Jr. reportedly said. “Very generous, though. Thanks.”
The president slapped his son hard on the back. “Hey, maybe we can work out a trade deal. Wouldn’t that be fun?” Trump said. “We can make Cuban cigars legal again. What a tremendous deal that would be, believe me. They have the best cigars. That’s what they tell me. I don’t smoke. I think it’s awful. But you might like them. And there’s apparently an entire country there, not just cigars. It’s a very nice gift, believe me.”
According to sources, Trump Jr. was appreciative to have received an entire country from his father, but would have preferred the president to actually attend his wedding.
“I just want him to love me,” Trump Jr. said. “I’d trade a million Cubas just to play catch with my dad.”
At publishing time, Trump Jr.’s wedding had reportedly gotten off to a rocky start after he told his bride they’d have to change their honeymoon plans so he could travel to Cuba and assume power as its new dictator.
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