WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the war in Iran creating both unrest in the Middle East and uncertainty in the oil industry, Democrats expressed fear that higher gas prices could affect Molotov cocktail production.
Prominent Democrats warned their supporters across the United States that spikes in gas prices posed a significant threat to the affordability of Molotov cocktails and other improvised riot devices, and instructed them to plan accordingly.
“This will disproportionally affect our voters,” House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries told reporters. “Trump is waging this unjust war in Iran, and it’s driving oil prices through the roof. How are our supporters supposed to afford the gas they need to keep producing Molotov cocktails for use in their peaceful protests? It’s a tragedy.”
Democrats said that the production of Molotov cocktails would be slowed at best, or even brought to a halt altogether. “We have no idea how long this war will last,” Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer said. “The higher gas prices go, the more our violent constituents will feel it in their wallets. If we can’t count on Molotov cocktails being produced in the quantities we’ve come to expect, our entire operation will be affected. Molotov cocktails are an important part of the democratic process in this country. It would be a shame for such a long-standing tradition to be hampered in any way.”
At publishing time, Democrats urged their supporters to avoid using too much gas in their vehicles so they could continue to produce Molotov cocktails.
Do you think you can guess which one is the terrorist?
