VISALIA, CA — According to sources, an awkward conversation spiraled toward its inevitable end Tuesday, marked by simultaneous drink sipping.
Two friends who hadn’t seen each other in years attempted to reconnect this week only to discover they no longer had anything in common. After several minutes of small talk and one or two shared memories, the conversation abruptly stalled and the pair resorted to sipping their drinks to buy time until they could think of another topic to discuss, a topic that would never come.
According to witnesses, a man identified as Andrew Hale said, “Yeah.” This signaled the end because he could think of nothing substantive to add. His former childhood friend, Craig Summers, echoed the sentiment. “Yeah,” he replied. And the conversation died.
The simultaneous sipping of drinks, though intended to buy time for either of them to think of something more to say, served as a quiet toast to the death of their awkward conversation, and their friendship. Witnesses claim the moment was so awkward the silence spread to other tables. The entire restaurant became silent until the pair quietly finished their meals and left without another word.
Allegedly, the awkward converses spoke once more once outside, but only to ask where the other parked. “I’m this way,” said Summers. “Oh, I’m this way,” Hale said, pointing the other direction. “Okay, bye.”
The pair parted, presumably to again sip drinks quietly when they returned home, drinking away the memory of their terribly awkward moment.
What happens when a politically divided family sit down for a “peaceful” dinner?
