STANLEY, ID — A paddleboat ride at a local lake resulted in about seven seconds of enjoyment for a local couple, followed by twenty minutes of pain, work, sweat, and regret, sources revealed.
“I love this!” exclaimed Ben Burchstead, five seconds before despair set in. “We have this thing for how long? Oh… 45 more minutes. Wow. That’s… alright.”
The Burchsteads decided to rent the paddleboat in what they assumed would be a fun way to spend a Sunday afternoon. Soon, though, their hopes of enjoyment were transformed into feelings of fatigue, frustration, and impatience.
“Come on!” shouted Ben’s wife, Katherine. “You’ve got to pick up the pace, honey. We’ve got an eternity left on this thing, there’s no shade, and I think I just saw a snake in the water, so we can’t jump in even if we wanted to. How do we have so much left to go? Have we entered a time loop?”
The couple had foolishly rented the two-seater paddleboat on Redfish Lake after the parks department employee dishonestly told them it would be a relaxing activity.
“You guys are going to love it,” the worker said while struggling to hold back a smile. “See you in an hour.”
At publishing time, the Burchsteads had returned the paddleboat 15 minutes early and had set their sights on what they were sure would be a short, enjoyable, five-mile hike around the lake.
Do you think you can guess which one is the terrorist?
