LOS ANGELES, CA — A grassroots movement among baseball fans appears to have gained significant traction in recent weeks as fans beg New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani to “please” hug the Dodgers mascot.
According to sources, the New York Mets haven’t won a single game since Mamdani visited the team and hugged mascots Mr. and Mrs. Met. Now fans are shelling out the cash in hopes he will do the same to the Los Angeles Dodgers.
“Every dollar counts. Our nation needs this,” said local Padres fan Lyle Wyman. “Can’t you spare just five dollars for the hug?”
Though the Dodgers do not appear to have an official mascot, they do employ assorted “bobblehead” style characters from time to time, which fans believe will suffice for the Mamdani hug. “I don’t care what the Dodgers have. Go hug Ohtani then,” said one angry fan. “Just hug somebody, anybody! This is what can bring America back together.”
A fan campaign online has currently raised over $4 million to send Mamdani first class to Los Angeles to hug whoever may be available.
At publishing time, Mamdani had been taken out by security guards after reports that a deranged lunatic was trying to charge the field to hug a bobblehead.
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