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Trump, Iran President Sign MOU; Trump Says He Had No Choice
U.S. President Donald Trump and Iranian President Masoud Pezeshkian signed a 14-point memorandum of understanding that ended the war in Persian Gulf for 60 days until final details of a peace deal are negotiated.Trump signed the pact at the…
Nate Bargatze Does Not Owe Anyone an Apology
Comedian Nate Bargatze is under fire for attending this past Saturday’s “UFC Freedom 250” – the seven-bout ultimate fighting spectacle at the White House. The controversial event emerged out of a long-time friendship between President Donald…
Report: Inside Peter Thiel’s Private Club, Where Oligarchy Builds the Future
A leak from Peter Thiel’s private Dialog society offers a rare look at how America’s political, military, financial, and technology elites gather when they believe the public is not watching.The result is not just embarrassing. It is…
I Felt Like “Neo in the Matrix”: Jillian Michaels on Leaving Leftism — the Left “Comes for Everyone”
“There is no one as illiberal as a liberal with power,” goes the apocryphal saying. And a warning about this very phenomenon has come from a perhaps unexpected source: fitness icon Jillian Michaels. The Left “comes for everyone,” is how Michaels…
Learning from Trump, Man Successfully Negotiates Wife Down to Absolutely Everything She Wants
DAYTON, OH — Local man Troy Greer announced that after a long, intense round of negotiations with his wife, he had emerged victorious and had successfully negotiated her down to getting absolutely everything she wanted.Citing the shrewd…
Man Continues Tenth Year Of Sending Just A Thumbs Up To Every Single Text Message He Receives
ROCKPORT, TX — Local man Jake Minter confirmed that he had now entered his 10th consecutive year of replying to every single text with only a single thumbs-up emoji.The streak carried on its decade-long run this morning when Minter's wife…
World Leaders Line Up To Ask Trump To Bomb Their Countries For While And Then Give Them A Few Hundred Billion
WORLD — Global leaders rushed to sign up for Trump's incredible offer to have the U.S. bomb their country for a few weeks and then give them $300 billion.Sources within the White House reported days of jammed phone lines as countries from…
Joseph Hoping At Some Point To Have Dream That Doesn’t Make Everyone Want To Kill Him
CANAAN — The young son of a prominent family remained optimistic that he would someday have a dream that doesn't make everyone in his life want to kill him.Local resident Joseph admitted that, despite his track record, he was holding out…
Iran Wins $300 Billion Cash Prize For Placing Second In War
TEHRAN — The leadership of the Islamic Republic of Iran was reportedly overjoyed to learn they had won a grand total of $300 billion for coming second place in the war against the U.S.Despite suffering catastrophic damage, the Iranian leaders…
Elite Volleyball Player Helps Push ‘Save Women’s Sports’ Measure Through Arizona Legislature
A measure to keep boys out of girls sports will appear on the ballot in Arizona this November thanks to brave activists like elite volleyball player Kaylie Ray. HCR 2003, which the Arizona Senate approved in a 16-12 vote along party lines last…