Nervous Speaker At Pride Event Relaxes By Imagining The Crowd Fully Clothed

NEW YORK, NY — The speaker giving the keynote address at the New York City Pride Festival admitted that he pictured everyone in the audience fully clothed to calm his nerves.

Though he often experiences anxiety before giving speeches, he later said that he had developed a trick to put himself at ease when speaking in front of large Pride Month crowds.

“I get anxious when I have to speak in public,” Marcus Grant told his friends. “A few years ago, someone suggested I look out over the crowd of almost nude attendees and picture them all wearing pants, shorts, shirts, dresses… to be honest, I know it sounds silly, but it really works.”

Those gathered to hear Grant’s address could be seen sporting thong underwear, leather haltertops, see-through shorts, rainbow-colored fishnet tights, and little else. Public speaking experts say the best way to calm nerves when standing in front of a large audience is to envision those to whom you’re addressing wearing nothing at all, but in these cases, Grant said it’s far more effective to do the opposite.

“I know it’s usual to think of everyone in their underwear, but everyone was already in their underwear at the Pride Festival, or worse, so I just do the opposite of that, and it really helped.”

Grant’s talk focused on the rights being taken away from the LGBTQ+ community, although he struggled when asked to clarify what rights were actually being lost.

At publishing time, dozens of the audience members had been kicked out of the event for ignoring the dress code and showing up fully clothed.